Sunday, 15 November 2009

My spider-sense is tingling

Let me preface this post with an acknowledgement: I am arachnophobic. I am so freaked out by the thought of anything creepy, crawly and specifically, spider-y, that I would rather go and sleep in my car than face the thought of that eight-legged creature walking over me in the dark, should I happen to spot one in my bedroom when MadCat's not around.

I've been trying to change my spidey-killing instincts since I met him, given that spiders are his favourite creature - so quiet and industrious. I have been known to dangle lengths of toilet-paper into the bath so that spiders trapped in its white expanse can get a grip and climb to safety (as long as I'm not in the room). I don't automatically swat or grab the Doom - although I do shriek like a girl - when I spot one in the vicinity.

But on Friday, I went past all that.

We've been running an adventure challenge at work all week. Eating gross food (not that I would have a problem with roast sheep's head, brains or eyeballs - hey, I'm coloured, I grew up eating that shit!) and pulling keys out from underneath an annoyed tarantula.

I mean, I couldn't take part in the competition, given that I was running it, but. But. I have a horror of creatures being mistreated in front of me. So, naturally, I got all protective about Miss T, snarling at the people who tried to provoke her by banging on the glass of her box (seriously, people, WHAT THE FUCK? Leave the freaking spider alone! How would YOU like to be in a glass bowl with moronic giants banging on the walls and sending vibrations through your head? It'd be like standing in the church tower of Notre Dame while the bells rang! People just DO NOT THINK, the fuckers.).

And then I met Raul, the spider wrangler, and we chatted. He took the keys out from under Miss T. Then he put them back under neath her. Then SHE decided she'd had quite enough of this crap, thank you, what with people kicking the table and screaming as they crowded around, and went off to the back of her tank to have a good sulk. The winner pulled out the key and drove off in his prize. And I stayed behind to guard Miss T from idiots trying to open the tank and pull her out while Raul was inside.

From Spidey
Finally things quieted down, and it was just Raul, Shopgirl and myself. All this time, I was thinking of MadCat, and how stoked he would be if I managed to actually allow Miss T to touch me. Lubabalo came outside and allowed her to walk all over his hands. Shopgirl did the same, making sure I took pics so she could show her son there's nothing to fear. And finally I allowed Raul to put Miss T on me.

From Spidey
Only on my sleeve - I couldn't quite bring myself to actually allow her onto my skin; after all, still FREAKED OUT BY SPIDERS ARGH!; but I did it without shrieking or swatting. She crawled up above my elbow and settled down without trying to reach my shoulder (THANK ALL THAT IS MERCIFUL).

Let me tell you, a tarantula the size of my hand? Is freaking heavy.

From Spidey
Shopgirl went so far as to allow Miss T to crawl across her bare shoulders and cleavage. Actually, I think I could have handled that; but every time I thought of taking her onto my hands, my heart started pounding and my breath grew short. Minor panic attacks.

Still, I did it! I'm proud of me. And MadCat is, too.

(Click pics to embiggen. Will pop up in new window)

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